Every one of us faces desires. Whether it’s the pull of the opposite gender, love for fame, money, or the constant urge to follow trends — our nafs keeps whispering: “Just this once.” But Allah ﷻ has created us not to follow desires, but to control them.
Understanding the Nafs
In Islam, the nafs means the “self” — our inner soul that pushes us towards choices, good or bad.
Allah ﷻ says in the Qur’an:
“Indeed, the soul is ever inclined to evil, except those upon which my Lord has mercy.”
(Surah Yusuf 12:53)
This means our nafs naturally desires comfort, pleasure, and sin — unless it’s trained and purified through faith and obedience to Allah.
An-Nafs al-Mutma’innah – The peaceful soul, content with Allah’s will.
- An-Nafs al-Ammarah bis-Soo’ – The soul that commands evil.
- An-Nafs al-Lawwaamah – The self-blaming soul that struggles between right and wrong.
- An-Nafs al-Mutma’innah – The peaceful soul, content with Allah’s will.
Our goal is to move from the first stage to the third — from following desires to finding peace with obedience.
Step 1: Remember the Reality of This World
The world looks attractive, but Allah reminds us:
“Beautified for people is the love of desires – for women, sons, wealth, gold and silver, fine horses, and crops. But these are the pleasures of this worldly life, and with Allah is the best return.”
(Surah Aal-Imran 3:14)
Desires are not evil by themselves — but following them blindly destroys our hereafter. The world is just a test. Every temptation you resist adds to your reward.
Step 2: Know the Enemy – Shaytaan
Shaytaan knows our weak points. He uses our nafs to pull us toward sin, step by step.
Allah warns:
“Do not follow the footsteps of Shaytaan, indeed he is to you a clear enemy.”
(Surah Al-Baqarah 2:168)
He won’t tell you to sin directly. He starts with small things — a look, a click, a chat — and slowly makes sin feel normal. Recognizing his tricks is the first defense.
Step 3: Train Your Nafs with Discipline
The Salaf said: “Your nafs is like a child. If you let it do whatever it wants, it will never grow.”
Train it with discipline:
- Control your eyes. The Prophet ﷺ said:
“The glance is a poisoned arrow from the arrows of Iblees. Whoever lowers his gaze for the sake of Allah, He will replace it with sweetness of faith.”
(Narrated by al-Haakim – Hasan)
- Control your time. Idle time feeds temptation. Keep yourself busy in productive work, learning, or worship.
- Fast often. The Prophet ﷺ advised young people:
“O young men, whoever among you can marry, let him marry, and whoever cannot, then let him fast, for fasting will be a shield for him.”
(Sahih al-Bukhari, 5066)
Fasting weakens desire and strengthens willpower.
Step 4: Strengthen Your Imaan
Temptations are strong when imaan is weak. Build your connection with Allah:
- Pray all five salah on time.
- Read Qur’an daily with understanding.
- Make dua — even just saying: “O Allah, help me to control my nafs.”
- Sit with righteous people who remind you of Allah.
The Prophet ﷺ said:
“A person is upon the religion of his close friend, so let each of you look at whom he befriends.”
(Sunan Abu Dawood, 4833 – Hasan)
Good company keeps your imaan alive.
Step 5: Remember Death and the Hereafter
When desire feels strong, think of your grave.
Think — will this sin look worth it when I stand before Allah?
The Prophet ﷺ said:
“Remember often the destroyer of pleasures — death.”
(Sunan Ibn Majah, 4258 – Sahih)
Remembering death cools the fire of temptation. It reminds us that this world is temporary, but the next life is forever.
Step 6: Seek Forgiveness and Don’t Give Up
Everyone slips. The difference between a believer and a sinner is repentance.
Whenever you fall, don’t lose hope. Return to Allah immediately.
Allah ﷻ says:
“And those who, when they commit a sin or wrong themselves, remember Allah and seek forgiveness for their sins… and they do not persist in what they have done.”
(Surah Aal-Imran 3:135)
No matter how many times you fall, get back up. Allah loves those who repent sincerely.
Final Thoughts
Controlling desires is not easy. But remember — every time you fight your nafs, you rise higher in the sight of Allah. Real strength is not in muscles or fame, but in controlling your inner self.
The Prophet ﷺ said:
“The strong man is not the one who can overpower others, but the one who controls himself when angry.”
(Sahih al-Bukhari, 6114)
Keep struggling. Keep purifying your soul. One day, your nafs will no longer fight you — it will become peaceful, and Allah will call it:
“O tranquil soul, return to your Lord, pleased and pleasing.”
(Surah Al-Fajr 89:27–28)